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Conflict
Conflict shows up in relationships for several different reasons, such as, money, power, sex and very different communication styles. We usually learn our communication and how we approach conflict from our family of origin.
Conflict can be both healthy and unhealthy depending on how it is negotiated. When conflict becomes too "hot," (yelling, name calling, angry tears) partners fail to articulate needs from a place of fairness or dignity.
Conflict can be both healthy and unhealthy depending on how it is negotiated. When conflict becomes too "hot," (yelling, name calling, angry tears) partners fail to articulate needs from a place of fairness or dignity.
communication styles
Not feeling cared for, being misunderstood, expressing anger or resentment typically results in failed interpersonal patterns of communication. Ironically, this one 'location' is where couples find themselves uniting to support conflict, together.
Different styles of communication, such as, assertion, withdrawal, aggression, inability to clearly articulate, or paralysis can get in the way of expressing your needs. Couples are often unaware that their communication styles differ, and those different styles can add fuel to an argument.
Different styles of communication, such as, assertion, withdrawal, aggression, inability to clearly articulate, or paralysis can get in the way of expressing your needs. Couples are often unaware that their communication styles differ, and those different styles can add fuel to an argument.
needs
Do you feel as though your needs are met in your relationship? Do you have difficulty asking for what you want because you're afraid of rejection? Do you feel as though your partner 'should' know what you want and need automatically because of the intimate nature of your relationship? Feeling unappreciated, resentful, hurt, or becoming sulky or sarcastic may be signs that you or your parters needs aren't being communicated effectively.
Is your sex life an issue between you and your partner? A difference in sex drives or lack of a sex drive often becomes a point of contention between couples. Very often the meaning of intimacy and sex are very different from person to person.
Asking for what you need is an important part in creating a healthy, loving relationship.
Is your sex life an issue between you and your partner? A difference in sex drives or lack of a sex drive often becomes a point of contention between couples. Very often the meaning of intimacy and sex are very different from person to person.
Asking for what you need is an important part in creating a healthy, loving relationship.
safety and intimacy
Negotiating safety means there is a commitment to the relationship, even when times are hard. This is when your partner has your best interests in mind and where it feels as though there is a sense of support, consistency and predictability.
Emotional safety allows you to be genuine because your partner "has your back."
When emotional safety is present intimacy follows more naturally. With closeness, couples are more apt to spend quality time together, listen to one another, express their feelings and offer/receive feedback. Research finds that 'intimate couples' tend to be more attentive and loving. Without a sense of emotional safety, intimacy is often difficult to attain.
Emotional safety allows you to be genuine because your partner "has your back."
When emotional safety is present intimacy follows more naturally. With closeness, couples are more apt to spend quality time together, listen to one another, express their feelings and offer/receive feedback. Research finds that 'intimate couples' tend to be more attentive and loving. Without a sense of emotional safety, intimacy is often difficult to attain.
balance
When lines of communication are open, there is a willingness to listen and understand what is important to the relationship as a whole, as well as, what is important for each partner.
Couples Tip: "Balance" is a process not an outcome. Our work together helps you manage conflict and consideration.
Couples Tip: "Balance" is a process not an outcome. Our work together helps you manage conflict and consideration.
